Mission to Souderton PA - Reflection

The week had finally arrived, and once again I found myself unprepared and uncomfortable facing what God had in store for me at the week’s end. I had agreed to preach an evangelistic series at my home church in Souderton, PA, as a follow up to an international evangelistic series called ShareHim that I had taken part in last summer. This program was held in Tegucigalpa, Honduras. It was given over 3 weeks from June 28th to July 18th 2011, and had included a total of 26 messages. I had never been on a mission trip before in my life, let alone gone off to a foreign country to actually preach. To say I was nervous and had serious anxiety over what I had gotten myself into would be an understatement. Yet God blessed me through my nervousness and that experience truly changed my life.

Serving the Lord in Honduras challenged me to the very core of who I am in Christ. I had discovered a passion I never knew I had and reconnected with a crucial Bible truth that I had somehow forgotten along the way: “All of our own acts of self-righteousness must fail in order to draw us into a deeper dependence on God.” Being in a foreign country, surrounded by a culture I didn’t understand, a language I couldn’t speak, and then being asked to preach (with the aid of an interpreter) was all well beyond my comfort zone.

For the first time there truly wasn’t anything I could do for myself and I had no choice but to fully lean on God. And it actually is true that, through our weaknesses God’s strength is made perfect; it’s not just a pretty thing we say in Sabbath school. When we free-fall into God’s arms like that, there can only be miraculous results to His glory. So when I returned home to the United States, I was on fire for the Lord and wanted to do a follow-up series here in Pennsylvania to keep the ball rolling. However, life had other plans. Due to scheduling concerns, getting a follow-up evangelistic series set in the books turned out to be quite an up and down affair. Dates were tossed around and suggested, until finally I had worked it out with my pastor to do an abbreviated series of five messages over four nights. The series would begin on a Thursday evening on March 15th and finish on a Sunday night on March 18th, rather than do the full two and a half week series. Yet despite the abbreviated length, as the time drew closer to actually begin preaching the series; my nerves gave me no peace.

As much as I enjoy leading others to God’s word and preaching on God’s love, I still get butterflies in my stomach and sweaty hands every time I am asked to speak in front of others. It’s just part of the process I go through I suppose. It is how I come up with excuses as to why God couldn’t possibly use a person like me, as Moses argued, “Oh Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue” (Exodus 4:10).

Well whatever the case may be, preparing for this weekend series was certainly no different. All of the familiar anxieties and doubts came rushing forward as the time drew near. In fact, given the nearly 8 month gap between speaking in Honduras to speaking in Souderton, I had felt that the fire God had ignited within me in Central America was certainly quenched by now. Plus, now I would be speaking on my own, without the aid of a translator to correct the minor mistakes I made along the way. Not only that, but these were not strangers I was speaking too, but people I see on a regular basis week after week. My own friends, family, and church would be my audience. The pressure was certainly mounting in my head, and it wasn’t long until all of the reasons why I couldn’t possibly do this began to flood my mind. Little did I know that, what the enemy brewed together to create a disaster within my head was actually creating the perfect atmosphere for God to come to my rescue once again.

Through the committed efforts and loving support of several church members, the necessary preparations were made and the word was sent out about the upcoming weekend evangelistic series. As I was helping to pass out some brochures that were made to promote the series to the surrounding community, I was completely shaken by what happened as I neared finishing the last block of a certain development.

A man was out near his car when he saw me approach his home with a brochure. He immediately became confrontational and defensive and demanded to know what I was doing handing out these brochures around the community. I explained to him that it was some information regarding a sermon series being held at the local Souderton church over the weekend. At the mention of God and church, the man was driven into a rage. He demanded that I stop what I was doing immediately and threatened to call the police if I didn’t get back in my car that very moment and leave. I tried to tell him that it was just some information and he was welcome to throw it away if he wasn’t interested, but he became furious and chased me to the car, yelling at the top of his voice.

I was quite shaken to say the least and began to doubt if I truly had done something wrong by spreading information on the sharing of God’s word. Around the same time, the very week before I was set to preach my series, I had also developed the beginning stages of a nasty stomach virus. My body started to become fatigued, I couldn’t retain fluids very well, and my belly was instantly driven into a chaos of growls the moment I tried to eat food. As if trying to govern the anxieties of my mind wasn’t enough, now I had to struggle to govern my body as well. Then, on top of everything else causing me to stress over this series, a girl from my past decided to contact me to see if there was any chance at starting a new relationship. This has been a point of personal struggle and drawn-out hardship for me to realize that we weren’t right for each other.

So on all fronts, from my personal life to my literal body, I felt completely attacked because I had decided to stand up and work for God. It truly is remarkable to see the Great Controversy played out in your life once you make a decision to move out of your apathy to serve the Lord. I know now that, praying the prayer in Isaiah 6:8 is no small matter to God. When we answer His call, “whom shall I send, and who will go for us” with a sincere, “here I am, send me,” God always answers that prayer; and no matter how chaotic it may seem to us, God will take you through what His will is for your life, step by step.

With anxiety, doubts, personal turmoil, and sickness swirling in my head, I prepared the notes for my messages and practiced my sermons aloud to myself multiple times. Even though, in my mind, I had every right to complain about doing this series, I still wanted to give my best effort for God despite my grumbling circumstances. I didn’t see how this small, four night series could ever be brought about to God’s glory, yet I still made sure to allow Him full access to the best of my abilities. To that end, I prayed and sincerely sought the Lord’s protection and guidance throughout the series. I prayed that somehow, even though the enemy is rising up against me and I’ve fallen victim to my nervous ways, that the Lord would still use me in a mighty way despite my flaws. Although it seemed that my own apathy had quenched the fire that God had started in Honduras, I prayed that through His grace and power He would set me ablaze once again. More than anything, I prayed that no matter what happened during this series, be it good or bad in my own estimation, that God’s will would be done and that His Spirit would dwell within me. And praise His name, ours is a living God who not only hears the prayers of His children, He answers them.

Through God’s blessing the meetings were a resounding success. Each night was well attended, with an average of 35 to 40 people. Of those present at the meetings an average of 25% were visitors, which comes out to be 8 to 10 guests per evening. The visitors were blessed with hearing a concise, intentional overview of several key Biblical truths that point to a God of love. This formed a solid foundation in Scripture that they can count on in these confusing times we live in. At the end of each message, an appeal was made for each individual to decide for themselves if they wanted to stand for the truths presented that night and unite together in prayer. The appeals culminated at the end of the series with a call for baptism, in which two members of those in attendance responded.

A young woman came forward, tears in her eyes, and gave her heart to Jesus and asked to be baptized. When the prayer was finished, she came over to me and embraced me saying, “Thank you so much! You brought me back to God! I never realized how much of this is really all about Jesus! I want to fully be a part of the church that opened my eyes!” Another young man approached me after the message and asked me if I would help him go through some further Bible studies in preparation for baptism. With a smile lighting his face, he exclaimed in amazement, “wow… I was just talking to a friend of mine about why there are so many religions, but I never really knew what the Bible actually said about that. I can’t wait to tell him what I learned tonight, this completely blew my mind.”

Not just the visitors were blessed by the message, but the church members were also inspired and revived with a renewed passion for God. Excitement brightened their faces and one individual even commented, “I came to support a young man on fire, I had no clue he was actually going to reach my heart!” Our God delights in taking us through what we think is “impossible” and bringing about a mighty work in His name. For who else but God could take a sick, anxious, sweaty-palmed young man who, in his mind, had all odds stacked against him, and use him to lead God’s people to the truth. This is the God we serve, and this is why I can believe the promise of Philippians 4:13 with a new appreciation, “I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me.”